I joined OKCupid in a fit of ‘why the hell not’

August 18th, 2014 | Copy
couple3 I joined OKCupid in a fit of why the hell not

People always say that love arrives when least expected, and from a direction you could never anticipate. Seems to be true. I never expected to meet someone so wonderful, so right, through online dating; all I wanted from it was a few random dates to boost my self-confidence, and I've somehow landed in the best relationship I've ever had. It's all something of a surprise, really.

I signed up to OKCupid six months after separating from my wife of two years; my marriage had failed comprehensively and it had cost me a lot in self-confidence. I hadn't given up hope but was definitely at a low ebb - lost, scared, confused, lonely - and joined OKCupid in a fit of "why the hell not". I figured I'd go on a few awkward, uncomfortable dates, they'd gradually get easier and go smoother, then I'd be in a much better position to meet someone out in the real world. It required a considerable amount of pride-swallowing but I figured I had nothing to lose by giving it a shot... and who knew? It might actually be kinda fun.

So I made a profile, bought 12 stamps and, before long, went on my first date. I was a wreck. I had to fill every lull in conversation with small-talk, all delivered in a fast, high-pitched voice whilst fidgeting with coasters, napkins & anything else that came to hand. Luckily my date was fairly patient and understanding.

Subsequent dates were easier, as I'd hoped. My profile was getting loads of kisses & emails - about 10 a day - so I made the most of it and went on a lot of dates over a short period (about 10 dates in 3 weeks). All had been pleasant dates, all nice intelligent girls with whom conversation was fluid and enjoyable, one or two with whom I'd felt a twitch of chemistry and was looking forward to dating again if the opportunity arose. It was very helpful to chat via email before meeting; it didn't feel like a blind date that way. We knew a fair bit about one another before we met.

Because I was busy with work, and because I was getting plenty of hits as it was, I didn't spend a lot of time looking through other profiles... but I did email one particularly pretty girl with a cheesy line: "If your personality is anything like as lovely as your profile picture, I'd love to get to know you". She responded before long and we emailed back & forth for a week or two before meeting up shortly after Christmas.

Linda provided much more than a twitch of chemistry. After 4 days, and 2 more dates together, I'd taken my OKCupid profile down - the search was clearly over. She's AMAZING. Everything I'd dared ever hope existed within one person. She's sweet & gentle, my intellectual equal, has a great sense of humour, loves to travel, great family, healthy career, AND she's gorgeous. I'm hoping she never figures out how out of my league she actually is...!

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